Could you be heading toward a divorce? Let’s look at the signs!
The reasons people get a divorce are rather clear: different life goals, different financial goals, never-ending arguments, or too many extra hours, allegedly spent at work, to name just a few.
But there are also certain things that might serve as a warning that your marriage might be doomed to fail.
From heritability to the level of education or the age you get married, read on to find out 14 surprising factors that increase your chances of ending up in the lawyer’s office rather than celebrating your silver wedding anniversary.
Divorce runs in the family
The reason your marriage is at a higher risk of failure could be something genetic. According to a study published in Psychological Science, children whose parents got divorced early in their childhood might have something in their genes that increases their risk of divorce.
Nature beats nurture as more than half of the 20,000 Swedish adults (adopted as children) involved in the study were found to take after their biological parents when it came to marriage and divorce.
The study showed that the relationship of their adoptive parents had little say in the matter while heritability had a greater influence on their relationship and possible divorce risks.
You’ve got other choices
It might sound like a cliché, but there’s actually plenty of fish in the sea. And the more you have a taste of those fish, the less likely you are to hold on to your marriage, according to SUNY Albany researchers.
But how can you tell if your relationship is in danger? Researchers revealed that labor-force participation and high geographic mobility rates can have a great impact on a relationship.
In other words, the more new people you meet, in a working environment, for instance, the more likely you are to stray from your marriage.
You got married too early or too late
You might be in love and all, but when it comes to marriage, apparently you should get married between the ages of 28 and 32 if you want to avoid a divorce, at least in the first five years of matrimony which are the most critical ones.
One study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family found that people tying the knot in their teens or late 20s have more fragile marriages.
“One reason children from divorced families get divorced more often is because they have a tendency to marry as teenagers,” says Wolfinger, assistant professor at the University of Utah’s Department of Family and Consumer Studies.
“The older you are when you marry, the less likely you are to get divorced. It’s good advice for everyone”.
You had kids before marriage
According to a study conducted by the University of Oxford, unwed parents who have children are more likely to get divorced than couples who got married before having kids.
The same study revealed that the growing number of babies out of wedlock in the last 40 years has undermined the stability of marriages.
Your partner is an extrovert
If your wife is a social butterfly, you should feel proud that you someone who likes to have fun and is fun to be around. On the other hand, if your husband is the toast of the town, life and soul of the party and complete extrovert, you might want to stick by his side more.
That’s because according to a study published in Psychological Reports, extroversion increases the risks of divorce, especially among men.
More than that, according to the European Journal of Personality, extrovert men, who like to flirt, are more likely to be unfaithful to their partners, unlike women with similar traits. On that note, check out these 18 Social Media Habits That Are Still Considered Cheating.
You have your personal finances in order
If you’re the type of woman who doesn’t need a man to buy her the things she wants, good for you. Your mother taught you well. There’s nothing wrong with a strong and independent woman.
On the other hand, statistics show that the risk of divorce is higher for women who are financially independent.
According to research published in Demographic Research, a woman with a little bit of money (or more) in her bank account doesn’t feel pressured by her financial situation to stay in a marriage that makes them unhappy.
You got a higher education
When you finished college, the least of your worries was that your college degree would have something to say in your possible divorce.
Well, according to research published in the American Sociological Review, the higher your education level, the lower the chances of calling it quits in the first years of your union.
Unfortunately, researchers at the National Center for Health Statistics estimate that around 75 percent of well-educated people could expect to get a divorce later in their marriages.
Your kids are getting older
You probably know that having a baby to save a marriage doesn’t work in most cases. But did you also know that children’s ages could have a significant impact on your likelihood of getting divorced?
One study published in the American Journal of Sociology found that children help a marriage become stronger when they are very young. On the other hand, when they get older, children may increase the risk of divorce and may even facilitate the parental decision to divorce.
Your partner has been married before
When it comes to tying the knot, you don’t necessarily get better at it by doing it more than once. Sometimes, you don’t learn anything from the experience and keep repeating the mistakes in the past.
One study published in the Journal of Family Issues revealed that women whose husbands have previously been married are at a higher risk of divorcing.
Therefore, if you want to reduce your divorce risks, before you decide to get hitched to someone who’s been married before, make sure your significant other knows these 13 Myths About Marriage That No One Should Believe
Your husband is older than you
Age might be just a number, but numbers can be important too. According to research published in Demographic Research, the age gap between partners can have a huge impact when it comes to the success of a relationship.
Couples where the man was at least five years older than the woman, have higher chances of calling it quits sooner rather than later. The bigger the age gap, the higher the divorce risk.
“While there are always exceptions to rules, a good rule to remember is that dating someone more than 10 years older will present challenges now or later that add to the preexisting challenges any relationship has,” says Seth Meyers, Ph.D., a psychologist and author of Overcome Relationship Repetition Syndrome and Find the Love You Deserve.
You lived together before you got married
Living together with your partner can be a good way to get to each other better, discover your likes and dislikes and ultimately if you’re meant to be together in the long term.
But premarital cohabitation has not been found to increase marital stability, according to a 2012 study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family.
In fact, living together before marriage has been shown to lower the rate of divorce in their first year of marriage, but increase their divorce rate after five years.
Your education levels are different
It’s truly beautiful when you fall in love with someone, based on their personality and intellect. But if over the years, that someone hasn’t reached the same level of education as you did, there’s a pretty good chance you’ll end up in divorce.
The Journal of Family Issues published a study that revealed that, the larger the gap in educational achievement, the higher the chances of ending one’s marriage.
Your beliefs are different
Nowadays, many couples have no problem having a partner with a different religious background. It’s not an absolute rule, but interfaith couples are more likely to call it quits than intrafaith ones, according to recent research published in Demography.
The reasons for the higher divorce rates can vary depending on “the beliefs and practices of the two religions, as well as with the mutual tolerance embodied in their respective doctrines.”
You work with many people of the opposite sex
You’ve probably heard that working with a high number of people of the opposite sex has been linked to higher divorce rates. But just how much of an impact can be working with the opposite sex have on one’s marriage?
Well, according to a 2015 Danish study, men who worked primarily with women, were about 15 percent more prone to get divorced, compared to men who worked more frequently with other men.
On the other hand, their female counterparts who worked almost exclusively with men were about 10 percent more likely to head for a breakup.