#6 They Don’t Consider What You Are Saying
Many times, when someone wants to manipulate you, they will assume that you have already agreed with what they have said.
A manipulative individual may casually and quietly assume that you agree with what they say in an attempt to get their way. It’s natural for us to project our biases onto other people and situations. However, someone who wants to control you will attempt to perplex you and claim that anything you say or do supports their point of view. If you express your disagreement with someone, a person who is not attempting to mislead you will be open to hearing you out.
When manipulators use your memories, they frequently succeed in getting what they want. For instance, someone may remark, “You don’t recall this conversation? You have always had a poor memory.” A manipulator can get their way without the need for a discussion or a compromise by claiming that a decision or agreement was already made.
58 Responses
Good info
You forgot a crucial one: they compliment you excessively. Always a sure sign of manipulative bs.
So true, lately the complements are so often it’s sickening, I quite acknowledging them. My mistake today was taking him shopping with me and him telling me I didn’t need something. After 21 years I told him we’re pretty much through so on comes the 10 yr old brain he reverts to and now he is pouting. Wasn’t kidding, I am done
Ridiculous
Have you forgotten these sights really just look for a topic- in return pulls many advertisers. Congratulations… you just have been manipulated.
That is mentioned in the article.
Depends… not necessarily…
My ex, a church deacon, asked if he could “worship” me. I told him I wanted us to worship God together. Months later, he insulted me — then defended it. I ended it.
Ya right, Steve.
My Husband has been Manipulating me for 20+ years.
Hes not physical but he is Emotionally and Physiologically,
been abusing me, and it’s very hard to get out of, I have
anxiety from the abuse
I left . Changed the locks. I just faced the consequences. Whether legal. Danger. Financial. It all worked out. It wasn’t easy but it’s the best thing you could do. Go for it.
I totally agree with you unfortunately I don’t have courage to do that I still think that she needs me
Do you have children? Mine has tied up the court system, continuing to manipulate and harassed, and doing so to my children as well. Since they are underge, they continue not to be heard.
yep i did it after 34 years, i have been divorced 21 years now and never looked back
Hello Crystal: I am sorry to hear of your current situation, but I am sorrier that you are choosing to stay in it because it is “hard to get out of”. It may be hard, but it is NOT impossible because I know from experience. Life is hard but you can change things if necessary if you really WANT to. You say you have anxiety, and you will continue to have it as long as you allow this to continue. There are many women who have been where you are who put forth the effort to get out of it and you can too. If you put on your “big girl panties” and start changing your own life, you will get out of your situation. Stop listening to the lies he uses to keep you in his grasp, call the police, call the abuse hot line but DO something please!!! You do not deserve to live like this and it is not God’s will for you to
Find someone else and leave
My husband has been manipulating me for 50 years. It doesn’t work like it did at first. But he tries different methods. He is extremely controlling. Simply put, he is not a nice man (to me with no one else around to see it). Leaving would mean moving out of state without a vehicle and my life articles. A good amount that I could not leave without. My grandchildren are here. Up until 7 years ago I only saw them about once a year. Now I can be there for their important life celebrations, holidays, ect.. There is nowhere local for me.
You can always get out,takes strength and determination on your part,you’ll keep experiencing it as long as you put up with it,gotta care for yourself enough to put an end to it.
My wife did the same thing!
When you’re had enough, it will be easy to get out!! You will walk away feeling liberty and freedom from oppression . I know, I just walked away after 23 years of pure unadulterated manipulation. I knew it, but I hadn’t had enough of it evidently. Now that I was manipulated out of a home that was paid for, all the money from my escrow, after I had to sell it, and my bank account..And yeah, there’s a lot of pouting going on. Not by me this time. Now I deal with the resentment. A bit different, but Manipulation is an ugly character trait to say the least. It’s not my style but I can see it coming. Stand up for YOURSELF! My favorite saying is.
To tolerate injustice, is as bad as it is to commit it! In other words if you don’t stand up, then you are abusing self. That really made me think that I needed to get mad enough to help myself. That’s what I did…
Go thru this everyday
I see you. It took me over twenty years to lose everything and start over at 55. It was hard and still is at times but life is hard. Life is so much easier in so many wonderful ways everyday. I can do what I want , go where I want, be who I want. I can have as many animals as I want. I found I absolutely love living single. I love the solitude. The best part is there are men out there who are not like your spouse. I don’t want another spouse but I enjoy the company of a good man if I run across one. My kids are still mad but I know if I had stayed I would have been dead before I hit sixty. My life would be over. I hope you make it too. You will be in my thoughts and I’ll be cheering for you.
The biggest manipulator I’ve seen in Officer Micah Vehrs of the Logan Police Department in Utah. He also a malicious liar that gratifies himself by destroying the lives of innocent people. While interrogating his victims has asks the most fantastical and disgusting question to make his victim sound like a dangerous monster. For every question he “asks” he chooses one answer and will not agree to any other. He will keep pounding and pounding the same answer into his victims head until they either agree or stop talking. When they stop he’ll finally write that answer down that he pre-selected. Micah Vehrs is pure evil.
Yes so many law officers are corrupt, just like the one you have mentioned some even abusing children. thank you for the real raw truth it takes guts and love for others to post facts about the laws in a negative light. People just assume the badge mean good help huh they victimize also. We have a sheriff on this block that has entered this house uninvited numerous times he had a key. the lawmen stated he is going to take this house for his son.
And SO many crooks are the same way.
There’s some officers who do the same thing in Idaho and Washington State. I’ve heard that instead of firing them, they just transfer them to another place.
Uh, I hope this guy is long gone.. right?! How can that behave stand? It’s like he’s the bad guy behind the badge!!! Give me all info…. So reporting this to a higher place
Wow! Sounds like someone I know.
Tnx for sounding it out ❣️🧿
Excellent and important information
So true. Could the person you describe be Socio paths. My husband seems to fit so many of the characteristics of a sociopath. He will get notions to do something, if it hurts another person, or breaks any kind of law or causes an inconvenience or makes another person wait because he puts if off, he is fine with all of that. It is always what he wants. Money matters are the worst. Lying is a way of life for him. It matters not, to him, if he lies. It’s a struggle, but I always forgive, not forget, but accept him back into your acceptance.
Logan Utah police department sounds like a throwback to pre-millennial practice, when interrogations were not recorded. Once it became better understood that there are some police officers who do not respect the rights of accused, making recordings became standard. Surely the “evil” policeman mentioned could be caught and he would be looking for other ways to abuse people where he is not so protected by the thin blue line.
Police work is really very difficult, and quite dangerous so that we need to be as supportive of the majority of police who try with substantial energy to do the right things, as we wish to be critical (and punishing) of those who step over the lines of laws and decency. Some aspects of good police work have a need to manipulate the public, both in rooting out the really substantial evil of some, and to encourage the good which can be found in most creatures (even humans).
If you want something, whether you believe you deserve it or not, you will consciously or psychologically structure your actions and behaviors to achieve it…that’s human nature…but its our learned Civil, moral, ethical and ethos behavior we must follow… to be fair, kind and considerate of others that we must obey… because being honest and truthful, good or bad… are choices that we make, which will be dictated by the strength of our character.
I feel that I am being manipulated by my friend guy. I really want to know. I really want to be with him but something is not right. Been seeing him off and on for about 26 years. Need the truth once and for all.
Sweetie: your answer is pretty clear after 26 years. He’s not into you. Pick up your feelings and move on!
We can achieve your desire.
Ditch him. If you feel it in your gut that things are not right, believe it. I was in an emotional relationship with my husband that wasn’t feeling right. I left him after 25 years. It’s scary but you want to do it. Ask the universe for help. I did and never felt better for it. Good luck!
My one ex best friend conned me into coming home from my vacation to Aruba after 3 days! We are no longer friends! She said my cousin couldn’t take care of my mother! I came home and it cost me $3000 !! My other best friend 🙄rearranged my mother’s funeral! Different day different church and she was going to have different clothes! Different music, readings everything! WTH! Then her husband left her and
I had to take her home! To North Carolina 😱. She had so much luggage that I had to donate my mom’s stuff and my stuff to goodwill in order to fit her stuff in my car! And then there was when my dad died 😱 my stepmom signed paperwork so I couldn’t even see him and then she had him cremated on my birthday then she told me that he hated me! This was why he cut me out of the will 😭 so not true! They killed him!
Leave!! If it doesn’t “feel” right, you know in your heart it will NEVER change especially after so many years!! You ARE strong! You have the truth already, now take action. Then do something for yourself that you have Always wanted to do, whether it is traveling, taking a class, trying a new sport, learning a craft, listening to local college free lecturers, volunteering, etc do some new things for yourself, you might not like them or you might find a new passion….meanwhile, your person might be might be right in the middle of one of those paths!
26 years ??? You already said you want to know the truth….and that something is not right & it’s a on & off years of manipulation…it seems that you have accepted this behaviour. You are hindering ur future. Mr. Right is around the corner. Start today
Maybe more gentle…like “we need to get married or maybe …”
The members of minority groups are also more susceptible to manipulation is just more leftist BS. the constant victimhood thing and then the writer adds the privilege crap the leftist use. The “minorities” are the privileged people. perhaps the writer is racist and see minorities as weak and helpless.
I think the writer is referring to the Sherri Petini’s and Susan Smith’s of the world who continually manipulate law enforcement claiming a person of a minority group caused them harm
You beat me to it Doug. Its unbelievable–in an article about signs of manipulation, they actually manipulate the reader with their leftist ideology masked as some form of professional psychological research and conclusion. They’ve infiltrated every corner of society like a virus and think they can hide behind and within these sectors and change policy and ignore truth in favor of their ‘dogma’.
“The minorities are the privileged people” lol 😆 yea we love it when we get harassed by cops for no reason, denied jobs & loans that we qualify for, punished in school for things everyone does etc etc etc! Yup, us minorities have it so good. Butcha’ right-wing MANIPULATIVE BS
I think the minorities should stick their chests out and tell all the manipulator jerks they need to straighten out and fly right and on their own insides reject the idiots…if they are idiots why bother to listen.
I feel like it might have been useful to also explain that sometimes the person (the manipulator) may not even realize they are being emotionally abusive. Many people do not even know they are manipulating. Sure, there are plenty of bullies out there that know exactly what they are doing and they are evil but there are some who do not know they are doing it. I have seen that manytimes when there is emotional abuse in a relationship it is often two sided and both people are at fault and the relationship has turned toxic. I also wanted to point out that manipulation is not always just a bad thing. We manipulate and are manipulated daily, it is not alway an act of harmful intent.
I don’t see any signs listed as they said there were 7 but I think manipulation is more common than normal communicating. So you can probably count on it.
I’ve realized I’ve been manipulated, taken advantage of, threatened and coerced my entire life. I’m 47 years seasoned and suffered a stroke at 36. I’ve worked for family for all of my working years and still to this day, wouldn’t change a thing. My family raised me to respect hard work and I’ve devoted all of my loyalty to my family. I’ve worked with my dad in the family ready mixed concrete company. Office work, dispatched trucks. I felt great pride in doing my duty to our family’s livihood. Opened a cafe with mom and sis, we all had a third. This is when things changed. After two years of the cafe being opened, I wasn’t recieving a wage. The gracious customers gratuities was my only income. I paid my taxes on my gratuities. My own mother went to Europe, twice and made me believe the cafe wasn’t doing as good as it appeared, and how dare I be such an ingrate. Owners of businesses dont get paid. Shut up and think how lucky I was. Ok, sorry. I won’t rock the boat. It makes me so mad at her for what really was happening. Not only did I lose an owners share of revenue, for 20 years, she failed to report my work credits to the social security administration, after 40 years of employment I am a ghost to the ssa. When I turn 65, I will die to survive on $236.00 a month. That’s just for being an American citizen. I could start a very invasive audit on my mom and her employment tax fraud but I know it wouldn’t explain or lessen the utter betrayal and hypocritical behavior of my mom.
I am so sorry, because I have experienced the same from my mother. Good as gold many times, but will lie to get over on her children. I believe it was a Survival instinct bssed on her own terrible abuse as a child. Find a good IRS rep or attorney experienced in “lost wages” you deposited company checks right?
I had 2strokes at 49 and I am 69 now. Two years ago I got markedly better after pushing myself to go beyond painful limits. You must take care of yourself also! You’ve been a dutiful “employee” my folks owned their own business & YES, the owner must receive a paycheck to go to SS…just like YOU! And their pay (even if they use some to help their business) sets the Money Amount they will get at Retirement. Good Luck. It’s a Pragmatic move to help you live into Senior Years. Don’t delay. 🧸🌻🧸
Great article and I would just like to add. Misery loves company. Let grown people make their own decisions. Giving advice is good; but, just because theirs differ from yours doesn’t make your choice right.
Sounds like the entitled Karens of the world who continually manipulate law enforcement pretending someone of a different ethnicity is harming them. e.g. Susan Smith, Sherri Petini
Absolutely people are are always trying to manipulate you, especially if it’s going to benefit them and their actions. Never trust anyone. I have learned the hard way
This article is right on point. I just got through going through all 7 of these points, but with a cousin, as a oppose to a partner.
There were no directions to help with being manipulated. I did not see any seven signs. This article was not helpful.
Manipulation has its positives, I work with homeless and poor people and on many occasions used manipulation to help them improve their lives.
WOW! The acme of pettiness! We are ALL manipulated/psyched out 24/7 (yes, even in our dreams by the “beast” of Bible fame).
We are psychologically manipulated on a constant basis by business, politics, religion, education, and military interests, quite often via electronic media.
Step inside a chain grocery store and the packaging, layout, and choice of products, lighting, et al. is psychologically formulated to cause you (UNWITTINGLY??) to buy more and spend more! THEY ARE INSIDE YOUR HEAD INFLUENCING YOUR “FREE” WILL!
How about the big pharma ads when you watch the news on the (appropriately named) idiot box? All the actors singing and dancing over the “marvels” of their nasty drugs! How SICK is that? Then the NEWS—soaping and rinsing your mind, forming your opinions for you!!
Don’t forget “education” and I won’t elaborate here about the decades of “dumbing down” that they are so proficient at!
SOOO—-modern people are so manipulated by so many prevalent sources that they are little more than well programed money squandering zombies—fed a constant barrage of carefully formulated psychological propaganda!!
You KNOW that, but ddo you address this dastardly dilemma? No—you only focus on an ultra downgraded form of 1 on 1 personal petty manupilation! SHAME ON YOU! You are right in line with the beasts drive to dominate all the minds it possibly can!
SO VERRRY SAD, ain’t it?
This is yet another attempt to wake up your sleeping bedazzled minds, zombiacs—another gift from your favorite sage, feral Tomm
Some commentators heve confused ubuse with manipulation. There is s big diffrence between the two.