After a Scam: The Psychology of Recovery and Reporting
Discovering you have been the victim of a scam can be a devastating experience. The financial loss is painful, but the emotional toll can be even greater. It is common to feel a mix of anger, embarrassment, shame, and fear. The first and most important thing to know is this: You are the victim of a crime. It is not your fault. Skilled criminals targeted you with powerful psychological tools. Your recovery starts with self-compassion and taking strategic steps to regain control.
Step 1: Focus on Immediate Financial Safety
Before you do anything else, take action to protect your finances from further harm. Move quickly and methodically.
Contact Your Financial Institutions: Call your bank, credit union, and credit card companies immediately. Tell them you have been a victim of fraud. Ask them to freeze any compromised accounts, stop payment on any pending transfers, and reverse any fraudulent charges if possible. They have dedicated fraud departments to handle these situations.
Change Your Passwords: If you provided any online account information or believe your computer was compromised, change your passwords immediately. Start with your email, online banking, and any other sensitive accounts.
Place a Fraud Alert: Contact one of the three major credit bureaus (Equifax, Experian, or TransUnion) to place a free fraud alert on your credit file. This makes it harder for someone to open new accounts in your name. You only need to contact one; they are required to notify the other two.
Step 2: Report the Crime to Protect Yourself and Others
Reporting a scam can feel daunting, but it is a crucial step. It helps law enforcement track criminal networks, and it creates an official record of the crime, which you may need for your bank or insurance. Reporting also helps protect others from falling for the same scheme. It is a powerful act of community service.
Where to Report:
The Federal Trade Commission (FTC): Report most types of scams online at the FTC’s website. They collect reports to build cases and identify trends.
The FBI Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3): If the scam occurred online or involved the internet, file a complaint with the FBI’s IC3.
Local Police Department: File a report with your local police. This is especially important if you know the scammer’s identity or if there was a local component to the crime. Get a copy of the police report for your records.
Step 3: Process the Emotional Impact
The emotional recovery is just as important as the financial one. Allow yourself space to process what happened without judgment.
Practice Self-Compassion: Speak to yourself as you would a dear friend who went through the same experience. Remind yourself, “I was targeted by a professional criminal. This is not a reflection of my worth or intelligence.” Blame the perpetrator, not the victim.
Use a Grounding Technique: If you feel overwhelmed by anxiety or shame, bring your attention back to the present moment with a grounding exercise. Try the 5-4-3-2-1 Method. Take a slow breath, and then calmly name:
5 things you can see around you.
4 things you can physically feel (the chair beneath you, your feet on the floor).
3 things you can hear.
2 things you can smell.
1 thing you can taste.
Talk About It: Shame thrives in silence. Sharing your experience with a trusted friend, family member, or member of your Verification Circle can be incredibly healing. It reduces the emotional burden and reinforces that you are not alone.
If the feelings of distress persist and interfere with your daily life, consider speaking with a mental health professional. A therapist can provide a safe, confidential space to work through the trauma of the event and develop coping strategies. Resources are available from organizations like the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA).
