2. All-or-nothing thinking
This is also among those perfectionist traits that can affect your relationships with others. The perfectionist tends to think things in extremes. It’s either black or white, all or nothing—there’s nothing in between. Since perfectionists accept nothing less than excellence, “nearly excellent” is not enough, and they see it as a failure.
If this sounds like you, even small mistakes get you upset, even if the result has been good. For instance, instead of being content with the fact that a presentation has been well received, you’ll dwell on the typographic error that you’ve overseen on a slide.
Perfectionists usually don’t go well with the idea of working in a team because they will always want to make things perfect. This may lead to interpersonal conflicts.
5 Responses
AHEM! Looks like THIS type of personality has the makings of artists and craftsmen!
Let’s look at the OTHER end of the spectrum—slovenly hacks who do just the minimum to “get by”.
Who would you rather have repair your car, remodel your house, or tailor a suit of clothes? A “get by easy” slob, a mediocre nil-wit, a “grab the $$$ and run” shyster or a hard driven perfectionist??
We perfectionists have our place. Like ME, Feral Tomm, for example—I was a property inspector—you could hire ME to find defects, flaws, and safety hazards in a house you were interested in buying. OHHHH the realtors hated me! YES! I was the guy who could always find the scab on the apple! Quite often, a home buyer could use my findings to save 20, 30, even 50 times what I charged— from the asking price of the dump I inspected—once my scathing report was issued.
True to your opinion of perfectionists—“THEY WERE ALL DUMPS”!! In MY opinion! The whole crux of the matter is THIS—at what point do you stop? Everything my father built or repaired was a true hack job. He’d throw the tools down at some point and belch—“EH! GOOD ENOUGH!” And I would ask myself “WHY?? Why is a sloppy job “good enough”?
Perfectionists are seldom lazy (well, not always, my oldest brother perfected laziness to a fine art. Having 7 quasi slave children helped). Perfectionists often have a strong conscience and wish to do the best they can. I always felt a strong obligation to satisfy my clients and “go the extra mile” for them.
Why are there not MORE perfectionists among the populations? Too many lazy people, too many crooked people, but mainly few people with enough patience for perfection. I am not “defending” perfectionists. We are just a different breed, one with higher standards. We don’t NEED any putting down. Just use us and appreciate us and it’s a WIN/WIN deal for all! (Except greedy realtors??)
My perfectionism led me to Jesus Christ—the most perfect person to set foot on this Earth! Rather than settle for life as a lazy slouch, or crooked demoniac—WHY NOT FOLLOW THE EXAMPLE OF OUR LOVING SAVIOR and live a worthwhile life?
This timely missive is yet another free gift from your favorite Sage—Feral Tomm. YOU ARE WELCOME!!
Whoa! I love this! And I love Jesus! Amen my friend! Thank you for sharing! = )
Yes, completely agree with all you stated!! Why not strive for top quality?! Anything worth doing is worth doing it right. Strive for perfection; achieve excellence. Only Jesus is truly perfect, and I rest in His love.
Thank you for your reply Feral Tomm. It was a true and great reading. I always seem to compare my work with others, and I see that I do way more than others, and then get angry or unsatisfied because the “others” didn’t do their job right.
I have no doubt that I’m a perfectionist. All of the above items fit except fear and low self esteem. Very few perfectionists that I know deal with them either. They know their trade, know they can accomplish, and are proud of the results. If unhappy with anything, its someone else’s work.