Lie-detection tip: Listen for “Conversational Spotlights”

Liars tend to emphasize their messages with specific cues that therapists call conversational spotlights. What do words and phrases like: as a matter of fact, believe it or not, actually, as it turns out, honestly, and essentially have in common?

These terms often serve as linguistic markers revealing a speaker’s need to emphasize, clarify, or substantiate what’s being said. They could be seen as the verbal equivalent of highlighting or underlining text, signaling to the listener that what follows is important or may counter what’s generally assumed.

Phrases like these are used to magnify and draw attention to the significance of the message. By paying attention to them, you can better understand how to tell if someone’s lying in certain situations.

They actually indicate two entirely different things based on the context. When used by someone trying to convince another, a guilty suspect being interrogated, their use could indicate deception. But, when used non-sarcastically in a casual conversation, they mean that the person is interested, open, and trying to impress.

So, it may be harder to spot a liar in everyday life using this lie-detection tip. Just remember that in a more serious conversation, like if you suspect your spouse is cheating on you, these phrases take on an entirely new meaning.