You’re half listening to why they want to talk to you
Most of the time, kids aren’t always in the mood to chat, especially after they become older. But constantly keep in mind to give them your full attention when they urge you to listen to them. Put the phone down, switch off the TV and any other sources of distraction, and stop multitasking so that you can concentrate on the conversation.
Grab every moment you can since they are transitory, even if you disagree with what they have to say or aren’t very interested in what they’re telling you. Whatever the topic of conversation, it doesn’t matter! What matters is that you’re sending the right message—that you care about them enough to put everything else aside and listen to what they have to say.
I consider my parents “authoritarian” because they always knew better and as I grew up I had to fight about my cloths, my friends, my hair style and even my glasses. There was no support of “ME”. When I went to college I never called home. A friend caught me one day and told me my parents were on the phone. I said to tell them I’d call back. He said that they told him to drag me to the phone with whatever force necessary. I answered and my mother said, in her clenched teeth manner, “Just when were you planning ion calling us?”
Years later, when I was grown and married and living 6 hours away, I called my folks a few times, so I could tell them something. The next day I tried again but couldn’t reach them. I called my sister who lived another couple of hours from my parents, to see if she knew why I couldn’t reach them and she said, “They’re here.” They had gone to visit my sister and would have had to drive within a mile of my house and weren’t going to even stop by. so, they ended up stopping by on their way home but just for a couple of hours before they left to go home.
One interesting thing I realized after my father passed away. Most things I did, in order to get recognized at work, I did so that I could tell my father to show him how successful I was so I could gain his love and respect. In later years I would do something I was proud of and think to call my father and remember he was not around any more. I would think of calling my mother but I needed the recognition from my father. That’s when I started to live my life for ME !!